Instagram's Growing Role in Digital Relationships
Instagram has become central to how young people initiate and maintain romantic relationships. Features such as Direct Messages, Stories, likes, comments, and story replies allow users to communicate instantly and build emotional connections more quickly than traditional face-to-face interactions.
The researchers note that this convenience also creates opportunities for emotional manipulation. Behaviors that initially appear caring—frequent compliments, constant attention, rapid replies, and promises of commitment—can gradually shift into controlling communication patterns that undermine victims' emotional independence.
Rather than viewing love bombing as simple overenthusiasm in dating, the study positions it as a form of digital interpersonal communication in which affection is deliberately used to establish emotional dependency before introducing control.
A Qualitative Investigation of Real Experiences
The study employed a descriptive qualitative research design focusing on five members of Generation Z living in Medan City who had personally experienced love bombing through Instagram.
Researchers collected data through:
- In-depth interviews
- Non-participant observation
- Documentation
- Source triangulation with a communication scholar
The participants represented different educational and occupational backgrounds, including high school students, university students, and a teacher. Their identities were anonymized to protect privacy. The researchers then analyzed recurring communication patterns across participants' experiences to identify common stages and strategies used by perpetrators.
Four Communication Styles Used by Love Bombing Perpetrators
One of the study's most significant findings is that perpetrators rarely rely on a single communication style. Instead, they shift strategically between different approaches as relationships develop.
The four dominant communication styles identified are:
Dynamic Style
Perpetrators accelerate intimacy through constant messaging, compliments, daily attention, quick responses, and immediate future planning.
Equalitarian Style
They create the illusion of compatibility by mirroring victims' hobbies, beliefs, personality traits, or life goals, making victims feel uniquely understood.
Controlling Style
Once emotional attachment forms, communication shifts toward monitoring activities, demanding immediate replies, expressing excessive jealousy, restricting friendships, and establishing unilateral relationship rules.
Withdrawal Style
After gaining emotional control, perpetrators reduce communication, disappear without explanation, block victims, or abruptly end the relationship, leaving victims emotionally confused.
According to the study, these communication styles function as sequential strategies rather than isolated behaviors. The transition from warmth to control is a defining characteristic of manipulative digital relationships.
Love Bombing Follows a Predictable Cycle
Across all five participants, researchers observed a remarkably consistent communication pattern consisting of four stages.
1. Idealization
Victims receive overwhelming attention, compliments, emotional validation, religious or future-oriented promises, and continuous digital interaction that creates rapid intimacy.
2. Devaluation
Communication becomes increasingly controlling. Victims face demands for immediate responses, monitoring of online activities, jealousy, interrogation, and emotional pressure.
3. Discarding
Perpetrators suddenly withdraw from the relationship through ghosting, blocking, silence, or quickly replacing the victim with another partner.
4. Hoovering
In several cases, perpetrators later attempt to re-establish contact by replying to Stories, liking old posts, sending nostalgic messages, or requesting another chance, potentially restarting the manipulation cycle.
The researchers emphasize that Instagram's communication features make this cycle easier to repeat because digital interactions can resume with minimal effort.
Instagram Enables Emotional Control Beyond Romance
The study concludes that Instagram serves not merely as the setting for love bombing but as the technological infrastructure enabling it.
Private messaging facilitates continuous emotional engagement, Stories provide opportunities for constant monitoring, likes and comments reinforce public validation, while blocking features enable abrupt communication withdrawal.
This combination allows emotional manipulation to occur gradually and often invisibly, making it difficult for victims to distinguish genuine affection from strategic control.
Why the Findings Matter
The researchers argue that the findings have important implications for digital relationship literacy, particularly among Generation Z.
Young social media users should recognize that excessive attention alone does not necessarily indicate a healthy relationship. Warning signs include:
- Pressure to reply immediately
- Excessive jealousy
- Monitoring social media activity
- Restricting interactions with friends
- Emotional punishment through silence
- Sudden ghosting or blocking
- Repeated attempts to reconnect after ending the relationship
The study also highlights the protective role of peer support. Several participants successfully ended manipulative relationships after receiving advice or warnings from friends, suggesting that digital literacy should include education about recognizing unhealthy communication patterns alongside online privacy and cybersecurity.
Insight from Universitas Sumatera Utara Researchers
The authors from Universitas Sumatera Utara conclude that love bombing should not be understood simply as excessive romantic attention. Instead, they describe it as a manipulative form of digital interpersonal communication that transforms affection into emotional control through changing communication styles and repeated interaction patterns on Instagram. This interpretation expands communication studies by demonstrating how digital platforms can facilitate emotional domination as well as intimacy.
Author Profiles
Dewi Suci Khairani is a communication researcher from Universitas Sumatera Utara (USU), Indonesia, whose research focuses on interpersonal communication, digital communication, social media, and romantic relationships in online environments.
Humaizi is a faculty member at Universitas Sumatera Utara specializing in communication studies, media studies, and digital communication.
Feni Khairifa is an academic affiliated with Universitas Sumatera Utara whose research interests include digital communication, social media behavior, and Generation Z communication.
Source
Khairani, Dewi Suci; Humaizi; & Khairifa, Feni. Love Bombing Communication Style on Instagram among Generation Z in Medan City. Journal of Social Interactions and Humanities (JSIH), Vol. 5, No. 2, 2026, pp. 273–292.
DOI: https://doi.org/10.55927/jsih.v5i2.17
Official Journal: https://journaljsih.my.id/index.php/jsih
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